I did a survey about love a while back. The core question sought to know when people felt loved the most and over 70 percent chose that “feeling accepted” was their top measure for feeling loved. It confirmed my thoughts that after all has been said about love, when we say we want to be loved, we are subliminally saying, without realising, that we want to be accepted. I dedicate a chapter in The ABCs of wellness book linking love to wellness. I can not wait to finally get it to you.
We tend to say: “ I want you to love me for who I am”
Ever met a man who keeps seeking to have sex with any woman they meet? You might think it’s their ‘little friend’ they can’t control. However, when you dig deeper, a man who may be seeking to be loved (accepted) by changing sexual partners is unravelled.
Ever met a people pleaser. A little more digging you realise it’s beyond low self esteem or lack of self control. With a deeper unravelling, a person who could be seeking to be loved(accepted) is exposed.
Ever met a workaholic who never stops until they prove themselves or their point? Underneath that is not simply a person who is hardworking and learnt mental resilience. Through a little soul search, you might meet a man or woman who wants to be loved (accepted) by the quality of their work.
Ever met someone who never stops talking and hardly lets others speak? Take out the minority cases of ADHD, you may not meet an extrovert or a confident speaker when you search deeper. Instead, you meet an outspoken soul who is screaming “I want to be loved”. They want acceptance through always wanting to be heard.
What if it’s someone who is not keen on expressing themselves or being around people for too long? We can refer to them as introverts. Rightly so. However, with a little digging you could find a person who withholds and retrieves because they want to be loved (accepted) through self preservation
I can give so many examples but you should get the point. To be loved is to be accepted. To be forgiving and seen regardless of strength and weakness. I love that Jesus’ love is the epitome of love that accepts through forgiveness and a needful redemption.
I hope that as you celebrate valentine, you remember that God is love and his love accepts you.
Also, here’s a gift from me to you this valentine’s day. I hope it blesses you
Happy Valentine’s day!
I pray you love yourself today by accepting yourself and you give someone the gift of love through accepting them for who they are.
With love
Adaeze❤️
Your wellness Buddy
PS: Need someone to help you unpack how your quest for acceptance or love may be affecting the quality of your life? join my coaching waitlist…
